DIALOGUE IS BEST WAY TO SOLVE THE PROBLEM

Educating Through Dialogue Focusing Solutions

By: Masbahur Roziqi

The author is a teacher of guidance and counseling at Probolinggo 1 East Java Vocational School
 
Violence in education seems endless. Not yet finished case one, another case appears. This is like what happened to AR, a student of 55 Surabaya Middle School. The 14-year-old student was slapped by NNK, the teacher. The reason is because AR violates school regulations, namely to bring mobile phones to schools (Jawa Pos Metropolis, 11-16/2017). Pity. That is the right word to describe the situation.

The event was at least reminiscent of two things. First the teacher has the task of educating (not rebuking), and secondly, juvenile errors, both moral and violations of school rules, should not be punished by violence. Both of these are the main core that need to be input from teachers who still prioritize violence.

First, let's discuss the task of educating. One of the things I offer and I have done so far is to do a dialogue approach. Yes, dialogue is the essence of education besides providing an example of behavior. In counseling, this dialogue is called balanced communication. Namely communication that emphasizes the personal uniqueness of students by the teacher. The teacher values ​​students as individuals who are unique. Not the same between students with each other. So that respecting them by speaking together is part of the appreciation for their uniqueness.In the school environment, there will always be mistakes made by students. No doubt this must have happened. But how the teacher handles it is what needs attention. There are several steps that need to be taken by the teacher to invite students to dialogue when they make a mistake. This step is called Dialogue Focusing Solutions.

The first step is to invite students to identify and assess the behavior that has been done. At this stage the teacher invites students to specify the "wrong" actions that have been made. Compare it with school norms and regulations. And judge fairly, whether the behavior is in accordance with the norm or not. The teacher listened intently, and tried to understand the condition of the student at that time.The second step, the teacher invites students to develop behavioral change goals in a better direction. This goal must be observable and measurable. By having a change goal, students have a clear reference to the desired change.

The third step, designing changes. After setting goals, the teacher helps students to design how to make changes. In this stage, the teacher must not give advice. But it encourages students to think of appropriate changes based on the students' own ways.

The fourth step, writing a contract for behavior change. After students are able to find ways to change, the teacher asks students to write it on a piece of paper. Signed by teachers and students. Its function for student commitment changes for the better. Commitments that formally bind students and teachers to collaborate change for the better.

The fifth step, strengthening and ending. At this stage, the teacher provides reinforcement / motivation to students to plan the behavior changes that they have designed. The teacher strengthens students' confidence and does not say disparaging words. At the end of the meeting, the teacher asks students to return to attend the agreed time. The goal is to monitor the progress of behavior changes that have been made.

Second, regarding the prohibition on using violence in punishing students must be carried out by the teacher. The view that violence is the best way to educate students is not the right thing. Violence according to Andi Mappiare, in his research entitled Psycho-Social Violence in Education and the Inevitability of Counseling Guidance in 2013, said that any form of violence in education only had a detrimental effect on many parties.

Sanctions do need to be for students who violate regulations or moral values. But it must be educational. For example students can be asked to do social work. Some of the things that can be done include asking students to clean the teacher's room, being a teacher's assistant when presenting in class, or asking these students to attend school organizations such as adolescent mosques. Some sanctions, even in the form of requiring these students to take part in voluntary work, sort out the garbage together.

Finally, these steps do not guarantee students will change immediately. Change is a process. The teacher has the obligation to guard the process. Telaten, and always not tired of having dialogues with students is a path that all teachers must go through. Because violence is only a way of endless despair for teachers.